Even after some time days/weeks/months/years have passed, we’ve all been there and we’ve all wondered: “Is my ex over me?” 

You know you shouldn’t care… you don’t really care… but you do, but not in that way, but… whatever. You just want need to know.

I always have a laugh when I see “quizzes” and “lists” online that prey on vulnerable, validation and safety seeking hearts that just want to know, “is my ex over me?” The truth is, your ex may be dating someone new, popping bottles at the club, not acknowledging your existence at all and still not be over you. So, if you’ve found yourself depressed after not being able to check anything off of a “is my ex over me?” list/quiz, don’t worry. Just like an illness that could be lying dormant and not yet producing any physical symptoms, “is my ex over me?” is a little more complicated than the obvious physical signs of someone not being over you.

Even after I had moved on from relationships in the past, I’ve always wondered at some point, “Is my ex over me?” “Is he struggling as much as I am after the breakup or is it just me that’s still on ocd-FBI-unable-to-move-on, sh*tbat banshee mode?” 

You too? Awesome. Let’s break it down…

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Ever wonder, “Am I in the right relationship?”

“Am I on the right track?”

“Am I making the right decisions?” 

Asking myself those questions used to send me into such a downward spiral of anxiety and “abort-mission-now-must-think-about-this-later,” avoidance that kept me in a perpetual state of: 1. Remaining in relationsh*ts  (which did a great job of keeping my self esteem at negative infinity). 2. Being THAT girl who always talked about her goals, hopes, dreams & desires, but never actually did anything to make it happen.

I had no way to know/answer “Am I in the right relationship?” or “Am I on the right track?” because I had no clue and I was scared. It was all way too complicated and so much easier to be the victim of “bad luck,” a prince-turned-to-f*cktard, the sh*tty hand I was dealt, etc.

So how do you answer (or ever know for that matter) “Am I in the right relationship?” or “Am I on the right track in life?”

I get asked these questions a lot and the answer is really simple. You guys know how much I hate complicating things.

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*at the end of this post you can get my most favorite (+ absolutely free), skin product {not pictured above} 🙂

I used to have super blotchy, broken out, dull and sometimes eczema-ridden skin that would flare up, even more so every 28 days, in the form of a beard/goatee of red, angry, inflamed zits on my face. As if my social anxiety wasn’t already bad enough, skin problems held me back from wanting to go out and be seen. When you’re in a state of emotional distress, anxiety, hopelessness, insecurity, etc., the skin is the first place to signal that there is dis-ease within.

Although opinions are always my own, this post is not sponsored in any way. Just pure realness and exactly what I use to maintain skin that now I don’t feel like I need to apologize for or make excuses about how “tired” I am when I don’t wear makeup (& have gotten more than enough sleep).

First, a few things about skincare, attaining supermodel skin and maintaining it…

Natasha Adamo's favorite skin care products to create, maintain (& fake) supermodel skin

My wallet has learned the hard way that just like working out, a fancy gym membership or fancy pantsy skin care products will not just give you a perfect body and supermodel skin. In fact, many personal trainers say that working out is really only a small percentage of being at your ideal shape and weight. It’s really what you eat. SAME with skincare. Yes, the products and my regime totally help and if I didn’t see such a difference, I wouldn’t be sharing them with you but here’s the thing…

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Working with an ex is like being a recovering alcoholic that has to bartend every day.

As far as post-breakup scenarios go, working with an ex is one of the worst. It’s one thing if you caught your ex cheating on you. Yes, it hurts and YES, it’s awful but the scenario doesn’t get Groundhog-Day-replayed every.single.day in the form of having to physically SEE the one person that shattered your heart in an environment where you’re not only expected to be functional, but your financial livelihood depends on you maintaining professional normalcy despite the “wtf-am-I-going-to-do?-every-square-inch-of-this-office-reminds-me-of-us,” insanity.

I’ve been there and I’ve allowed the reality of working with an ex to embarrass, humiliate and emotionally unhinge me to the point of my professional reputation, productivity and sanity being questioned (by other people in the office and definitely by my own self).

So how do you cope when you go from coworkers to do-me-on-your-desk-lovers and now, impossibly, BACK to coworkers? What do you do when you find yourself working with an ex?

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