“My ex says he changed. Do I believe him? What does this mean? What should I do?” This is a question that I get asked a lot from clients and readers.
When your ex reappears and says he has changed… he needs to be able to tell you exactly what it is that has changed – without you having to ask.
If he hasn’t truly changed, he will be banking on the hope that you have the same level of insecurity and low self esteem that you had in your relationship. If you do, you’ll eat up the “I’ve changed” monologue right away. He can then get back the control, access, and validation that he’s after (because remember, he is just as insecure as you were).
If someone has truly changed…
- They will give you the time and the space that you need to process.
- They’ll prove to you through their consistent actions that they’ve changed.
- There won’t be in any kind of pressure to secure your forgiveness and get back together.